Today, I was worn out because I had managed to control my feelings during working time. I had a disagreement with my boss in the morning and tried not to show my anger. We discussed how to support the marketing activity for our foreign companies. My boss insisted I visit the foreign companies very often even if it was for the small reasons. In addition, I should reflect on the marketing plan with the local staff. It sounded one-sided and unconvincing for me. I knew it was the way my boss liked, but I wondered who could do my job instead during my absence.
Because of last year’s restructuring, our team members were reduced by half, that doubled my jobs. I managed to prioritize things to operate our team right. Nevertheless, my boss would go on a business trip or work at home just to submit the documents. I had to deal with the inquires to my boss during her absence. I wondered if my boss knew the situation. Our team members complained a lot about it, but she apparently didn’t reflect on herself. That had been a headache I had for a long time.
That’s why, there is no trust between my boss and our team members. In addition, my boss tends to pay more attention to voices from local staff. Therefore, my boss often shares their complains without confirming if they are true or not, that really hurts us as well as makes us demotivated. Are local staff customers for my boss? In contrast, are our team members slaves or machinery for my boss? Inequality…
At the end of the discussion, I repeated that what I had done so far was not wrong. I had paid attention to not only local staff but also my team members. She was apparently dissatisfied with my opinion, but I didn’t change my thought.
This meaningless disagreement got me exhausted today, but I had to hang on to survive in a competitive society. This week, I was so tired because of many stressors. So, I currently enjoy drinking alcohol alone at home, that heals me very much.